Hello!
We’ve arrived to the last Love Letter of 2025 and I wanted to wrap it up in a pretty bow for you all and punctuate this year with style. What a miracle to be here with you right now. Alive, hearts beating, on this amazing planet, with all of these wild and primal senses, cosmic energy flowing, tectonic plates shifting, and a life that needs living!
Maybe it’s easy to forget that essential truth when the kids have the flu, work is insane with year-end deadlines looming, holiday stress is a stiff cocktail of crushing, expensive, disappointment, and it seems like the world is on fire.
As I’m writing these words, a pair of massive ravens are circling the gardens and orchard, throat singing their click click song. I can hear their wings cutting through the cold morning air. I can feel the circle they’re spinning around us.
The invitation is to stop.
The invitation is to look up.
The invitation is to listen.
There’s a vibration that I feel when I hear that raven song. Like a switch getting flipped or some divine gear turning the doors of a cuckoo clock open, my larynx lengthens wanting to call back, my chest rises, lungs fill, and my heart all-the-way opens.
Look up.
Say hello.
Listen.
Ok, message received: The world isn’t on fire.
The rocks and roots and ravens are all still singing to one another and to us. The clouds and rivers and crystal caves are all still singing. The planets and asteroids and black holes are all still singing, now, like they have been for millennia… The world beyond our psyches and egos and conditioning and news reels and social media feeds is very much alive and well. Pulsing, spinning, expanding, contracting, and meeting this moment with resilience and power.
She - Gaia - is alive and well. Nature is responding and correcting like it always has. Life can’t help but live.
So what is burning, if not the world?
In my humble opinion, it’s the illusion that’s on fire. The lies and the tricks and the secrets. The hidden agendas and the plots and the plans. All the stories we were told and lessons we were taught that separated us from nature, from each other, from the truth of our divinity, and from God…this is what’s on fire and I’m inclined to let it burn.
Apocalypse actually means to ‘uncover’ or ‘reveal’ and it most certainly is upon us as a species and as individuals. What we are and who we are is being revealed and, holy cow, are we lucky to be alive to participate in this Great Turning. Even with presents to wrap and travel to book, even with in-laws to navigate and aching bodies to inhabit…the truth is being revealed and the question raven seems to be asking is, ‘are you listening?’
Raven begs this question from just over head as 3I/Atlas a kind of interstellar ‘bird’, makes its moves even higher over head singing yet another song, an ancient song from the beginning and end of time. High over head, out in the distant reaches of the Universe, and inside the deep core of the Earth, life is singing and patiently awaiting each of us to join the chorus.
Hark! the herald angels sing!
It’s time to put down the fire hoses and let what’s on fire burn. It’s time to pull our fingers from the holes in this damn dam and allow the flood to wash away whatever needs drowning. It’s time to stop expending our precious life force propping up the illusions and, instead, turn our hearts and minds towards the galactic center beating inside our chests. Like raven, we each have a song to sing and life is depending on our willingness to sing it.
(In literal terms, resign from the committees and boards that your heart isn’t fully aligned with. Have the hard conversation with your partner about the state of the union. Explore boundaries at work and socially that will restore your presence and ability to sit still and quietly. Get support for your addictions. Take out your trash, fix the leaking faucet, look around your actual life and be honest about what needs your love and then love it. If you’re ‘too busy’ or ‘too full’ or ‘too tired’ be brave and cull! Be bold and prune! Be honest and take action.)
Maybe this feels like a privileged place to sit? Comfy on my hill while people the world over are suffering? Maybe, but I’m far from comfy inside the work of my own self-realization and can attest that anybody of any status that’s willing to work on themselves isn’t prioritizing comfort or ease. Finding the grit and then enveloping it - over and over again with our attention and care - is what makes a pearl and it’s an inside job.
I could imagine that if the nymph knew that it needed to completely dissolve into soup to become a dragonfly that it might resist such a destiny. I could imagine that if the caterpillar knew that it needed to completely dissolve into soup to become a butterfly that it might feel some fear about that process.
There are ‘wings’ on the other side of this metamorphosis for us and our descendants. We can’t even know what our species is on the brink of becoming and, although it’s scary and uncertain and strange and unfamiliar and unchartered and inconvenient…it’s our time. Your soul incarnated for this exact moment. It’s our time to allow nature to reveal our potential and our essence and, whether we like it or not, the dissolution is underway, right now.
As we speak, ancient codes in our DNA, like the imaginal cells in the caterpillar, are awakening. The change is happening from the inside out and it’s not going to wait for your schedule to clear or your bank account to rise. 2026 is The Year of the Closing Door and we could think of this a chance to fill our individual and collective chrysalises with the frequencies, vibrations, and awareness that we’ll want when it’s time to fly into the future that is 2027 and beyond.
The year ahead is PRIME TIME to clear out anything and everything that we don’t want to bring into the next epoch. It’s time to integrate and resolve everything we don’t want crystallized like a mosquito in amber. The victimhood, the shame, the fear, the insecurity, the worthlessness, the apathy, the vanity, the ravenous hunger, the scarcity, competition, and greed. This coming year, 2026, is an important time to lay down the bags that your dragonfly won’t want or be able to carry with its shimmering wings into the future.
You might be thinking, ‘what the fuck are you talking about Beana?!?!?!’ and, if that’s the case, it’s ok. I’m not offended :) I’m talking about our birthright as sovereign beings with choice to re-create our reality and manifest the kind of life we all know is possible. I’m talking about very deep time and cosmic cycles that are turning whether you believe it or not. I’m talking about the potential for each of us to manifest a peaceful life, a harmonious life, a generous life, a prosperous life, a connected life, a beautiful beautiful beautiful life in resonance with nature, all beings seen and unseen, and in alignment with truth and beauty.
May ‘too busy’ and ‘too full’ and ‘too tired’ dissolve, like the nymph, into a still pond of spacious potential.
May that still potential expand to the innermost and outermost reaches of every atom, cell, and structure in the YOUniverse and wash it with possibility and trust.
May that trust allow our beings to ring loudly with the song of the spheres, the song of nature, and the song of our authentic beings.
May the melody and harmony and rhythm beat our hearts and move our feet into new directions of true sovereignty, beauty, authenticity, and health.
May all beings reading this, and not reading this, find the courage to prioritize self-realization over everything else in the days ahead and pour their love into their own cups until they flow over.
May that overflow spill into the cups of those that need it and may a river and biblical flood of self-awareness and compassion rise our collective tides to the future.
May we trust in this strange moment and heed the call for ourselves, for our descendants, and for all Creation.
That might feel a bit dramatic and, well, it is.
It’s not every day that we get to live through prophecy and, as you can tell, I’m excited about it. I’m motivated and inspired by it. I understand the assignment and I welcome the diligence and effort that it will take to pass this test. Unlike a rising GDP or high test score, the prospect of excelling at evolving our species into a higher frequency of being feels like a movement I can pour my heart into and get behind and, so I am.
Want to join me?
Self-realization is the name of most of the games I like to play here at Rootstock. Discovery and imagination and transformation are wonderful bedfellows and my own life is the testimonial that confirms this path is one worth treading. The courage to gaze into the mirror and linger there, the courage to fall back in love with yourself, the courage to accept yourself and then change is, beyond any shadow of any doubt, the grail that we’re all seeking. It’s in the loving arms of our beings where love and intimacy bloom. It’s in the safety and sanctity of our own truth where wisdom can flow outwards. When we cultivate the home in our hearts and find coziness and comfort there, only then can we begin to lay the foundation to make a safe haven for others in our hearts and arms, in our enterprises, and on this planet.
It’s time…
Are you ready?
If you’d prefer to wait until the New Year and anchor some vision into your annual resolution, that’s okay, but I’d encourage you to scooch your resolution making to December 19th and to hold it - like a flame in a hurricane - through to the 21st. Dec 19-21st is a once-in-a-lifetime portal to connect, actualize, realize, and LOVE like you’ve never loved before. Mark your calendars, dust off your altars, get very still and speak your highest visions with the mouth in your heart.
Dang.
It’s on!
If you’re feeling a little stressed out by this Love Letter, that’s ok. Take a breath. I’ll take one too…
Deeeeeeep inhale into the HEART CENTER.
Deeeeeeep exhale out of the HEART CENTER.
I’m here as a friend, as a pilgrim on the Medicine Path, and as a woman who is listening deeply and allowing the noise in the silence to change my tact and guide me. I’m letting myself trust in the movements, trust in my guides, and I’m inviting you to do the same.
If you might appreciate some support to navigate this beautiful opportunity to arrive into the soup with less resistance, well, I have some invitations - online and off - to nourish and inspire your own awesome brand of transformation.
THE SPORE!
Conscious Community & Etheral Watering Hole
Born out of a true desire to be able to navigate this deep time of transformation in community, The Spore, is a ‘great kitchen table in the ether’ and a place for all of us to gather together in ceremony, in conversation, and in curiosity!
Learn more & get the 1st month for free!
The first Insight Council is going to welcome sharing on the topic of COME-UNITY! or community, integration circles and office hours are already on the calendar for January, and our first Turning of the Wheel Ceremony is planned for Tuesday, March 10th at 7pm.
The earth temple and homestead that is Rootstock has been a powerful teacher around fire, earth, air and water and The Spore is about to guide my work deep into the medicine of ether! I’m soooooo curious to see how this experiment goes and what we make of it.
UPCOMING AT ROOTSTOCK
Gathering together around fires, around altars, and in real life is *essential* to my own joy and our collective healing.
Check out the Event Calendarto be the first to know when something new is added and, please, feel welcome to come and experience this miracle.
That hot pocket for dream weaving and intention setting that I mentioned above (Dec 19-21) will be held by Eyal and Jodi here in the Belly facilitating a Stone Circle Solstice Dream Incubator!What a perfect container to ground into presence and manifest with intention and support!
If an overnight ceremony to dream in community feels like more than you can do, how about anchoring your dream for The Year of the Closing Door, onto a vision board? Cannabis is a friendly and supportive guide in unlocking our innermost voices and this creative ceremony will result in a map and compass and community for the year ahead.
The Moon and Sun Circles remain steady and safe harbors for those of us inside the great work of becoming! These circles are sturdy, consistent, and very healthy places to do the tender work of self-realization that is being asked of all of us right now. If you’ve never joined before but feel curious, know that you’ll be held with warmth and integrity. If you come all the time, we’ll be glad to see you again.
Sometimes we need help to unlock our potential. Sometimes we need spirit guides and cosmic sounds to vibrate our hearts open. Melinda Kinzie is a gifted sound practitioner and her Sacred Sound Sanctuary is powerful and staggeringly beautiful medicine. If you’re curious to feel a somatic and vibrational path into your deeper being, please let yourself be guided into this circle.
The Medicine Path
My work with the Mushroom teachers is, first and foremost, my priority.
Sure, there’s some other stuff that I’m doing (read above ^) but all of that is informed by and a result of my devotional practice and time spent on the pillow in service of my clients. All of that other stuff is complimentary and harmonious with the deep inwards and downwards work of healing with psilocybin.
My work with the mushrooms and other plant medicines was a primary pathway of self-discovery for me and remains a powerful portal into my own relationship with healing and growth. If you are feeling really stuck, really bored, really disenchanted, or otherwise at a loss for how to begin the slow work of self-realization, it’s possible that earth medicine can help you.
Every other Tuesday I speak openly about my work, answer questions, and help folks navigate if anything I offer might serve them. This is the place to get access to book a Medicine Retreat.
Heal in community inside my Spring microdosing immersion. Hundreds of people have found meaning and support with this simple but sophisticated approach.
For those of you folks ready and wanting to support your own communities to heal with microdosing, Kayse Gehert has assembled a wonderful Professional Facilitator Certification and I’m on faculty for 2026.
Use code ROOTSTOCK500 to enroll and save
Expansive Wisdom Summit
Harvard Divinity School | Jan 16, 2026
On January 16th, I’ll be joining a handful of other thinkers and feelers in the psychedelic space to tell some stories at Harvard Divinity School.
I love me a working microphone and assemblage of curious people and I can’t wait to bring some Rootstock love to Cambridge!
I don’t have details to share about tickets or recordings but, you can bet, if there’s more to share with you, I will.
OK!
It was a big year here. It was revolutionary! I changed almost everything about how I live, how I work, what I want, and how I get it… Looking back over the last 12 months I feel profound gratitude for all the lessons that allowed me to let go with such ease, that allowed me to say ‘no’ with such ease, that allowed me to prioritize my truth and my health and my purpose over other people’s expectations and desires.
I thought I was going to want and need a whole winter of solitude and silence to come back into my own shape but, as it turns out, silence is thick with presence which is thick with possibility. A few months to myself with less rigamarolling revealed that I have capacity and life-force to serve (and shovel). I am not interested in retiring or widdling wooden spoons by the fire all day.
I want to work.
I want to serve.
I want to help folks navigate this wild and potent time.
Getting myself grounded and healthy, prioritizing my own well being has revealed a pocket of capacity that I have to share and that’s where I put The Spore! This new offering is ripe with potential and I’m hopeful that this ethereal experiment in community weaving anchors us all more deeply into our bodies, onto the land we steward, into the relationships we inhabit, and into a future that gleams with golden possibility for ‘how we get to be.’ Consider it a ‘living love letter’ and a place to wax poetic TOGETHER about these times and this age. In fact, if this Love Letter stirred something in you that you’d like to share, there’s a thread in The Spore where we can talk about it.
This is already a massive missive and I’ll spare you the year-end round up and suffice to say that a hundred medicine sessions, a hundred microdosers, 24 Moon & Sun circles, 6 Stone Circles, over $15,000 shared via scholarships so folks can access this goodness, and our 7th 100 hour fire made for a profound year of being the change and building the world we want to live in. And a partridge in a pear tree!
THANK YOU for this last lap around the Gregorian calendar. Thank you for 12 months of love letters written and read.
Than you for your interest and care and, most essential, your precious attention.
I wish you all a peaceful and quiet wrap to 2025, a clear and bold vision for 2026, the courage and discipline you need to make your dreams a reality, and all the love and belly laughter you can bear.
Thank you.
I love you,
Beana
The distinction between what's actually on fire (illusions, conditioning) versus what keeps pulsing (nature, authentic being) cuts deeper than most end-of-year reflections. I kept thinking about that caterpillar dissolving into soup analogy while reading. The discomfort of not knowing what the other side looks like is probaly the biggest blocker for most people. We'd rather stay in familar misery than risk the transformation, even when the alternative is wings.